Yes kids, I'm that cuckoo for Square's cocoa puffs. If I can get a sense that Aerin is still reviveable I may rejoin Siren. I can't take it anymore. I spend waaay too much time reminiscing and missing the fun. I know it won't be 100% roses and sunshine if I do make it back. But I think I need to do it for my sanity.
For Lent this year, I gave up my cosplay plans (for Lent's duration, not forever). Actually, up to now, I haven't sewn or sketched anything. I had sort of hoped by shutting down that particular dream that it (and Vana) would leave my system. A sort of fantasy detox.
It didn't work... I'm thinking of cosplaying more and more and as I try to remember why I want to slog through the muck that is XI, I'm remembering many touchstone moments with my shells and some random folks. It also doesn't help me forget when I get blog posts out of the blue from other players (Hi Imma!). I *love* these - don't get me wrong. It just means I go back and relive more memories.
Killing one's internal identity is harder than it seems...
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