Dune Days Done Darkly

Tuesday



Shell Dunes party, DRK16 to 18. Fury PLed using the "aggro all lizards in zone at one time" method. While there was some discussion about skipping pages (Fury doesn't bother when he's in lizard camps) XP came fast and easy.

Wednesday



Picked up where I left off in Dunes, getting a quick shell invite from Goldenkid. I had thought it was another shell party but 4 of 6 were from other shells. In any case, I was already in the zone, and but for lack of food, I was ready.

Coldheartkiller PLed but we had many coordination problems starting up. Took a long time to find our rhythm, and even then we struggled. I died on the first two pulls, GK died on the second and again soon after... Our puller would get ahead of himself and sometimes Cold was AFK or resetting his connection. Apparently, he was playing from a Denny's this evening and their wifi has a 30-minute lease timer. Also, he declined to get me a "Moon Over My Hammy" as he's vegetarian.

GK and then Agles DCed and we almot gave up for lack of initiative in Val's part. Cold, Val and some others were in Skype call and very distracted. I nearly bailed but Val finally got back on. I had been trying to wrangle reps but as Val was lead I couldn't do muh but make suggestions.

I thankfully made DRK20 with a small buffer. For now, Dark Knight is done. Although, I'm actually enjoying my time on it. Much more than I'd expect given Dark is usually viewed as pure DD. To be fair to my stated opinions on jobs tho', I spent most of both nights tanking given that my damage output was regularly higher than the others.

At end of party Soho stopped by. We went to the Tree for an NM and spent about 20 minutes while he and Insertname bashed on lower level crabs (few shield points). However, his group took too long to assemble and I had to leave.

Speaking of Soho, he's male. Said a friend must have tweaked his Skype profile.

Running Around

I logged in after the doctor's appointment debacle, tasty Bob Evans dinner (for which I ordered breakfast) and shopping runs. Elder wanted to get SimCity 4 for his lappy but both stores we went to were sold out. Younger bought yet another shelf for his expanding Lego empire.

Once more, I tried the Bunny Hat run, and failed repeatedly. I still keep getting screwed by the mobile checkpoints. I'm looking into gear I can use just for this and then resell. Assuming I can't rope any Bardic friends into following me around -looks at Deej-

I soon gave up and moved to Promy-Holla to farm. Over the course of the evening, and allowing for a Monopoly Express break, I netted three sets of recollections, a Somber memory, half a stack of Radiant and about 2k XP. I'll be hitting DNC42 shortly!

At the end of the farming run, I hoofed it to Selbina and left for the evening. I need to hurry up and sell my loot and arrange my recollections and meds, as Argyle currently has a Holla run scheduled for Saturday at 3.

There was the usual shell chatter and revelry, and a good jungle party for some. Also, grabbed some new members. And I finally asked Ben nicely to skip the dude and bro addressing. I meant no disrespect and hope it doesn't mess up things between us.

Soho left me an IM but when I got back to it he'd already left.

Indiana Jones'ing

Isabiel? Isabiel of RDB and TV?



Every now and again, I check the Google Analytics report for my little blog. It's fun seeing an odd hit or two from foreign countries or from states I've not seen before.

One thing that's been constant is my highest hit counts have come from one state in particular, over the course of a year-plus.

Indiana has topped the charts for ages, and the only person I know from Indiana is Isabiel, my friend from RedDragonBrigade and one-time clock-minder.

Since I haven't heard anything from her in some time, and since I heard the good news that she took time off and had a baby, I was wondering why Indy still tops the charts.

Isabiel, if you're still reading away, I'd love to hear from you and how you and the new one are doing! If it *isn't* you, would whomever in Indiana keeps pinging my page please stand up?

Also, Dark, if you happen to be reading this, firstly, *slobber* And secondly, feel free to chime in, as you had the last Isa update.

:3

Why does it have to be this way?!

(I swear, if it ever happens close to me...)

As I said, I'm now halfway into "Daughter of the Forest". I'm starting to really like this one. I've not read any fiction of the Fair Folk - faerys - and there's actually a personal connection to Ireland. Learning of this world is quite fascinating for me.

The book took a long time to hook me, but unlike the last, this one's heroine has a strong and distinct personality of her own. Which she needs in this telling of the "Swans" legend.

However, near the halfway point (in my reading), tragedy strikes. Sorcha, our protagonist, is raped. I got angry. Again. Is this going to be a theme here? Strong female ^h lead characters have to be raped to show their mettle? (edited 01/25 to recognize Van's cruel violation)

I'm still reading, and I expect I'll be satisfied with the ending of the tale. Retribution for her attackers happened not long after the assault but there is more payback coming, for the one who set the whole tangled challenge upon Sorcha in the first place.

I don't mean to be a downer, but it really bothers me to think of this. As before, I pray it never happens to any of you, and should it, that you find the peace you utterly deserve.

On that note, usage of "raped" in shell has been bothering me more lately. Some of our members are a bit fond of scatological chat, which already peeves me some (see earlier post with Autumn), but flinging "rape" around as a battle description is starting to upset me too...

I may or may not speak up soon. Haven't decided if I want to go down that road with the Rogues.

Return To Work Eve

(I dun wanna go back to work...)

Sunday was supposed to be more me time as Ape was going back to St. Augustine to do the dinner and winter event thing. But she wasn't feeling well and didn't want to drive. I offered to take her on condition I could read when I got there. Which I did - I'm now halfway through "Daughter of the Forest" (see next post). But I did sit with the crew at dinner and walked the decorated gardens with Ape for a bit. Quite pretty, and with the cold, it felt nice and wintery!

Once home it was a late dinner for me then more Vana time. All I managed was several failed runs at the hat and a rescue mission. Onie called out a NM sighting right near where I was running, so I was going to grab it if possible. However, a hapless Mithra had gotten aggroed and I cured her until she won. There was some shell discussion about what to do and I was a bit surprised to hear some of my friends call for letting her die so someone else could claim.

Not on /my/ watch, buddy!

Earlier, I had asked Deej if he could help me with this blighted race with Mazurka. I said I might need to borrow him. Someone joked that it sounded dirty and Deej said that wasn't me, that I was where he went for "clean love" and someone else was his source for "dirty love". And that I was too paternal for that. (Paternal? It was maternal last time :3) Aside from shell giggles at that, I told him he was sweet for saying so, then whispered a wink about the other thing ^^

Day After Christmas

(A full day and night of fun!)

Saturday was a little more FF time. I worked on the new Smilebringer Bootcamp events. The Jeunoan tree I got was MUCH nicer than the Windy one. I failed to get the Bunny Hat +1...

Then, we began a major all-hands-on-deck garage cleanout. We came close to taking everything out front. I threw out so much old crap I was holding on to for no particular reason. I distilled several boxes into a couple. I also found some great stuff I hadn't seen for ages.

From there we went to Chili's to use my boss's gift to me, a gift card. I had the Honey Chipotle fingers (with the corn, lol) and I even ate a few slices of Mandarin oranges. Actually, quite good! I was so full I only ate half, saving the rest for later.

Back home, we tried out Scrabble Express and Monopoly Express (card-based versions). I beat all comers on Scrabble, and lost all rounds of Monopoly. However, everyone was glad to find a version of Monopoly I'd actually play.

From there it was on to Vana'diel and more runs at the hat. Then I caught wind of a NM fight in the Tree and opted to go. Turns out a group of 12 of us were going. While waiting for a few stragglers, we skilled up. I got levels in Club, Divine and Enhancing. The actual fight was cake with so many of us present. Had a laugh and some frustration when I cured a nearby skiller called Malewithtale (took me a few readings to catch that...) and so did Cotellesso, our PLD. So we wound up getting unwanted crabby attention until Male finally put it down.

Then someone wanted to go after the Ancient Goobbue, who might drop one or two rare great katanas. One did, a 59 piece. I wasn't going to lot but someone insisted. I didn't win the blade, but I did get lots of moss and tree cuttings which sell well.

There was a delay getting from the first NM to the second as Cote was killed near us. I wnt to get him and took a wring turn with him. The delay cost us about 15 minutes, and nearly cost me some cuddle time with Ape. Nearly! /wink

Christmas Day!

(Great day except for my slip-up)

The boys woke us up at about 8:30 and the unwrapping began! Aside from the small things, Elder got his laptop and Younger got more Lego sets and a bike. Both got new games (I had fun showing them the Scribblenauts PA strip). Ape got her new camera, a nice heart/cross necklace, PJs, and some smaller things. I got a CD, a few movies and some shirts, plus a nice hoodie. I didn't really ask for anything as I'm still in penance mode. Also, I'm directing gift efforts towards my cosplay gear.

We made it to my parents' at 10:30 and had the big breakfast. As always it was great but I finally realized something - I need to request sausage next year! From them it was the usual, but appreciated, cash plus small thoughtful gifts. Ape's fave was a musical ornament that plays "All I Ask Of You" from Phantom. That was our first dance at our wedding :3

From there, it was back home for rest and meal prep. Ape made her usual delicious mashed potatoes and then gave a Paula Deen baked mac & cheese recipe a shot. Yes, there was butter - a *lot* of it... We made it to her sis' place at 4:30 and were there until 9-ish. Presents, food, games, and chit-chat. The cousins got, among other things, a netbook and Band Hero. I wound up setting both these items up and got into BH enough to see Evanescence.

In Vana'diel I logged in just as Fury was starting Naax and Demire on ACP. I joined in with plans to stay on as long as they pressed on. Turns out the first round of key drops was it for Demire. They wanted to try more ACP at 8pm Saturday and I said I'd have to see. I ran to the Tenshodo with my key (already having finished the cutscene) and... I got Utsusemi: Ni! Really! Doesn't quite make up for the wedding fiasco, but I do need it, so, yay me!

In horrific faux pas news, I totally forgot Fury had said his wife and daughter were killed by a drunk driver last Christmastime. He mentioned wanting the holidays to end soon and then that her birthday was coming up. A bit confused, I said Happy Birthday to her and almost immediately realized who I was talking to. I felt so~o~o bad! I expressed my condolences to him as Demire reminded me.

/kneels respectfully.

Christmas Eve

Today was a busy day. Thankfully all our shopping was already finished, and everything wrapped. But there was plenty in store for me nonetheless. Ape took off for a bit and I ran to get breakfast for myself. Bear in mind, this was two in the afternoon as I'd stayed up late with the demos last night.

On returning home, I wolfed down my food and got ready in a flash because Ape neglected to tell me that we had to pick her mom up on the way to Mass and that we were supposed to pose for pics in her decorated living room. It was OK though - we made it just 4 minutes late as things were still warming up.

Mass was good but I had to sit a row up as there were too many of us for the middle-of-the-church pew we landed in. Father Luke is still awesome. He even had Santa come in at the end, which was very touching. Only later did Ape inform me we were at Children's mass, lol.

After that it was a quick stop for a last-minute gift card, then the drive to St. Augustine for dinner and light-gazing. Dinner was a major fail - the place we wanted was closed and the restaurant we ended up in was a mess. Food was decent but the service was slooow and the tickets were all messed up. After that we went to the central park area where most of the lights were. Driving over the Bridge of Lions to reach it provided a wonderful sight of the trees, buildings and walls lit up!

At one point in the walk, we went inside the Cathedral-Basilica of St. Augustine. My breath was taken away again. I've been here 37 years and somehow missed this. Well, to be fair, most of St. Augustine isn't my style. But this was something else altogether! We only had about 10 minutes as they were locking up. I walked around and took in as much as I could and then had to leave.

From there we stopped at Krystals for my dinner (I don't eat seafood) and we split an egg-nog shake. The food and the shake were very tasty!

Once home, I sent my Christmas well-wishes to my friends (the ones I found on, anyhow ^^). Deej, Kush, Kep and Autumn - Merry Christmas!

Now I'm reading and half-watching "A Christmas Story" and getting ready for bed.

Merry Christmas all, and to all a good night! <3

So-So

One might think with a full 8+ hours to spend in Vana'diel that much progress would be made. Nope. I logged in at about 1pm, checked in with Rogues (no parties or events underway) then flagged on both SAM (with a seacom for my other 16-18 melees) and BLM38. Nothing.

While in Jeuno spending my wedding money on Gobbiebag 7, I saw a shout from Splitzy for LB2 help. I was confident I could do *most* of the job solo, so I was hoping whatever he was bringing would balance it out. Turns out he brought PLD55, and a PLD friend called Nichol. But Splitzy didn't have the Vahzl crystal or OP warp. So Nichol made his way directly whilst Splitzy and I took the Long Walk. Splitzy joked that he shouldn't walk behind me because of my tail :3

About 45 minutes later we met back up with Nichol and got Splitzy's crystal. This would be very nice as I tele'd us after each Boreal mob to save walking time.

The first fight was with the Hound, and it was ugly. Not only did it aggro from quite far away before I could buff, hate was everywhere. Both of my companions were trained Paladins, of course. We managed to beat the dog, barely, but nobody two-houred and nobody died.

For the tiger, which also pre-buff aggroed, I asked for no vokes. I was able to hold hate most of the fight and I swear it was much easier that way. The Couerl was even easier, despite aggroing after buffs but before rest. I held hate the entire time and had little to worry about on cure panics or MP.

Also, both Martyr and Devotion were awesome here. And with Nichol subbing Dancer, we had a pretty good healing potential. Maybe could have set primary and secondary heal targets as I know we wound up curing over each other a lot...

Both were exceedingly appreciative of the success, and I think both were pleasantly surprised there was no death in such an underpowered party. No two-hours ^^

At the end of that, Bloomonkey asked for three-mage-gate help, which I offered once I was sure the two Paladins were set. Bloo finished off the Windy quest and went back home whilst I farmed. Two complete runs and not one Gravity! /sigh...

After that I took off. I played DDR for about 30 minutes and then took the boys to dinner. Ape was off with her mom by now, so on returning, I *still* had things to myself. And I spent the time watching Star Trek with the boys. Ape returned home about halfway in with snacks, so we all watched together and nommed. Both boys seemed to really enjoy it, which was good.

After that I watched Tron (scene-skipping and reliving proper arcades with the Clones) and then it was present-wrapping time. Both of us finished our gifts at about 1am and we watched some TV, then I came back out.

By now, the PS3 demos I'd queued up were done and I tried them out. Dante's Inferno earns judgment as a GoW clone, but one with a story I find fascinating. I never read the original poem but now I may have to. Star Trek D-A-C was dull. And GT5 reminds me why I'm done with the series that started my real-life race and technical driving - they've continued with the dumbing-down...

Tomorrow will be almost all family and of course, the next day is Christmas! Dunno when I'll be back on, but soon, friends, soon.

Work at the Office, Work at the Mall

Last day of work before my Christmas break!

Figured out the library system's barcodes - they're almost certainly Code 39, printed upside down of all things. I generated my classic number and taped it to one of the kid's cards. I'll have to check it out (see what I did there?) ASAP.

After work, we watched a great Survivor Finale. Russell did NOT win! Yaay! Brett's showdown against Russell for the final immunity challenge was epic but unfortunately Brett went down first... He was ridiculously gracious in his exit from the game: "Thanks for the adventure!"

Later, at the jury session, much was made of Russell's jerky play, Mick's moderate style, and Natalie's admitted coattail riding. In fact, it may have been the final word from Eric who credited Natalie with a deliberate strategy of staying close to Russell, as opposed to passively getting by, that may have handed her the win! Russ looked really pissed during the announcement of the final vote - GOOD!

I then went to bed, at like 9. I was beat, but let Ape and Bran watch Penelope. I roused a few times but missed almost all of it. I read some more then went to bed for the night.

Tuesday was shopping day, plus Avatar. Started the day at about 2pm and didn't get home until 11. I found enough items on Ape's list to do it right. When we got home, she wrapped her purchases. I have to wrap mine later.

Avatar - as I told Kep: "I felt the plot was somewhat predictable (a common ailment), the storytelling was very nice and had some unexpected elements, the action was top-notch and the FX were seamless."

Ape said something interesting - she asked me if I liked the Na'vi. I told her, in all seriousness, that they looked like Mithra - Elvaan hybrids of some sort. For the film they were perfect. But I wouldn't RP one.

Much later, she said something unexpected and very sweet: She wanted to get me a t-shirt made that said Aerin of the front and had a pic of Aerin on the back. She said the RSE was out but that anything else was OK, lol. I was genuinely touched!

Slowly getting into the new book... Setting is very interesting and the Celtic lore / Fair Folk angle is new for me. Plus, it's not *too* far from Ape's Scottish heritage.

Soho tracked me down on Skype. We chatted briefly but he left suddenly, as is his wont. Deej and Kepi and I chatted a bit more but I checked out at about 3am, to read while Ape watched Steel Magnolias. Again.

'Nights all!

Silly Season

I don't think I logged in "substantially" once from Tuesday to Sunday morning. I did check in from time to time but didn't do much. Between the book, Christmas shopping and other prep, and family activities (not to mention more overtime at work) it just hasn't been possible.

Friday was Ape's work party. First was about 3 hours at the rectory with almost all hands on deck. Then the party moved to the rented home of one of her co-workers. There, things got...interesting. We were supposed to see Avatar after the party but it was far too late by then.

Later that night had a fun chat with Kushi. We played "Name That Tune" for about two hours. She's got a ton of music, including DDR. Which she plays. Did not know that... ^^

But she decided to end the chat by /shaming/ me. Those of you who know me well, here, in Vana'diel or in real life, know that I don't often feel shame. I live with very little regret and am almost always sure of myself and my choices.

It came up as I mentioned the Georgia trip in the morning. I pooh-poohed the park (because I'm honestly not fond of the place) and she took me to task. She nailed me for taking things for granted. Please see closing thoughts below.

Saturday was Wild Adventures Theme Park! OK, excitement abated. It's not a bad place, and we got "gold" season passes on sale. But there's just not a lot there for me. There's only a few "real" rides and the animals seem to be on hiatus in the winter. However, there are a lot of live concerts throughout the year included in the pass price and some are of interest of each of us.

Ape and I did get to make out on the Ferris Wheel, ri~i~ight before she nearly lost an arm trying to wave to her sis, who had just arrived. Waving while the wheel was turning... It was scary - a spoke bent her arm down but thankfully didn't pinch it between the car and itself!

I may decide to go into details about "the sweater", but not tonight. It /was/ great fun tweaking BIL's mom over it tho'! :3

Sunday I was able to log in at noon and Shinmike (who was tickled I knew what that meant) was setting up Promy runs. I tried to get in and he offered me a slot in the second group. Well, nearly two hours later and Group One was still at it.

Feeling quite annoyed by this point, I bolted. I ran to the mall and blitzed the place, waking its full length and stopping in every Ape-gift-relevant store. I found one item on my list... But I did manage to survey 90+ stores and visit 10-odd in under two hours. I *know* how to shop!

Sunday evening was the Luminaria. To be honest, it's getting worse. The candy-throwing I mean. The lights and luminaries are beautiful as ever (where displayed of course) but it seems more people just want to huck cheap candy at the other lane...

When we came back we watched *Thursday's* Survivor, even though the finale was under way. That would have to wait until tomorrow.

Finished the book. It wasn't bad (and was quite steamy in parts! -whew!-) but it seemed like much more of a conventional romance. Helen's just not strong enough of a partner for Drake, IMO. Nothing like Phèdre and Joscelin at this point, although there's still some hope for her yet in the sequel. I want to get ahold of Soho soon and see what he thinks of my take.

------------------

What Lady Kushiel may not realize is that I wasn't taking it for granted. I *know* my life has been an almost non-stop embarrassment of riches, from a familial, experiential and emotional standpoint. I have led an amazingly charmed life, from unbelievable parents, a great sister, a perfect wife, and even good in-laws. I have been to several foreign countries. I have worked for large corporations and small non-profits. I have weathered many personal and family crises with these people at my side. I have seen what it is to be sated or hungry, from a financial, emotional or sustenance perspective.

I cannot name a single time I have ever wanted for something I needed. I have what I have because my parents made it a priority to give my sis and I what we needed and what we wanted, whenever possible.

I'm not positive where the shame came from, but I know that I have tried /not/ to "rub it in" because I *know* full well I have it better than most. Thanksgiving was hard because, while I was sitting there in the mountains surrounded by loved ones, I knew my friends (plural) were going through some major stuff. Fast forward to now - again, I have my amazing family (nuclear and extended) around me and I know that's more unusual than usual.

Library Card - Activate!

After 15 years, my library card is active again! I dropped Clone the Younger off at Tae Kwon Do then went to the library with the found books. The clerk was able to clear my card after some fussing, then I paid the $20 fine. She tried to give me a new card (with a new number) but I wouldn't have it. I have a 5-digit card number and the current ones are like 5 mil. I got that card 25 years ago and I'm keeping it! Now, to find out how to generate a barcode since the original card is long lost...

Picked up Burning Alive (Shannon K. Butcher) and Daughter of the Forest (Juliet Marillier). Burning Alive is the paranormal romance recommended to me weeks ago by Soho. The other was on my reading list.

Soloed briefly with Deej as the planned Assaults never started. Later, went to help him with PLD unlock but he opted to put it off and I went to bed.

Oh, postscripty... Is Ape still taking potshots at me? Watching Leno's 9 @ 9 bit with Tim McGraw, it was revealed that Mr. Faith Hill likes Neil Diamond and Olympic figure skating (men's and women's). I made a crack about "investigating further" to which Ape replied that he and I had something in common. Wha~? Which part? /sigh...

Time Travel

(Now, if only I could find my early-80's B-Wing...)

Sunday was garage cleaning day. I'd had enough of the mess the holiday boxes were making, and I saw a lot of car stuff from my old Lumina I could toss, as I'd never need it now. So I spent about three hours digging back in the wee recesses. Most of the stuff in this zone was mine. Either car junk or old toys and mementos. Most of the non-car stuff was pre-1995, when we moved into this house.

So, with Clone the Younger in tow, we looked through boxes of my old stuff. A lot of it was "construction toy" bits. Think Lego. Now think every Lego knockoff and "similarly-themed" building set you can. Also, plastic racetrack and train pieces. Mixed in were random things I thought were cool as a pre-teen.

He was getting a kick seeing the old stuff and hearing the stories behind some of it. He REALLY got happy when I found a box of Star Wars cards (Remember the old ones that came wrapped in wax paper with a piece of rock-hard gum?). I think most of them were ESB and ROTJ. I gave them to him and soon he had them all organized in an empty Yu-Gi-Oh album.

I'll be honest... There was something specific I was looking for. I thought I had found the cache of childhood joy the night I found the missing library books, but I was wrong. And since I'd cleared out almost all the old stuff I was getting aggravated. Then, in the last box I pulled, I found them!

If you'd like to discuss this find with me, please do so politely. I really don't feel like getting griefed over this. I get enough of that from my BIL, and he has no idea these exist.

Without further ado, I present...

My My Little Ponies. Yes, I had a bunch of these growing up. I don't know if there were more than this, but here's 15 ponies (regular, pegasi and unicorns) and the Stable, Carryall, and Grooming thingy. These are original 80's vintage G1's if you're keeping score.



The 6 in the carryall are in fine shape, but the 9 that were in the stable didn't fare so well... The bag they were wrapped in ripped and bugs got in. Made a mess of the place. I spent an hour trying to clean them up and I still need to get bug gunk out of most of their manes and tails... Also, some have discolored a bit and/or their paint is coming off... ):



I may go back and shoot them at an angle so their markings are visible. I wasn't thinking when I took these snaps and only afterwards did I realize they're pretty anonymous without their colorfully-marked flanks showing, lol.

And yes, I had some Breyers (I think I have one remaining) too, and a large wooden dressage ring (found it Sunday).

Enjoy!

Real Life Gets in the Way

I've been exceedingly busy at work lately, staying well past my usual "clock-out" time on these major projects we have cooking. Also, with Christmas approaching, our family's "silly season" kicks into high gear about this time.

Friday I partied on RDM, getting to within 2.5k needed for 41 (Refresh). It was not my finest moment as, assuming this was /that/ party, I died on arrival with a mob of angry ladybugs out for my blood. Got raised by Soho, who PLed for a bit.

The next day I soloed in Altepa. It was a pain but I managed to get it. In hindsight why I chose to go /WHM instead of the obvious /NIN is beyond me. But now I have Refresh and Convert and maybe can get some midlevel action on Red Mage. Plus, RDM's AF is totally sexy. 'Specially on a Mithra!

Sunday it was BLM's turn, in a Rogues group. The party worked OK but once again we could have used Sleep coordination on links. We wiped once and had some solo deaths too. But I got a little more than a full level off it.

Later that night I logged in only to find Deej under siege by Cyncere, Doylus and others. They were sharing moronic opinions of Deej's Valkurm gear. Valkurm! I've partied there in my wash day rags for lack of better armor at the low levels!

As soon as he told me I ported out, planning to give them a piece of my mind. But in the 5 minutes it took for me to zone in, they left. I /just/ missed them. Deej seemed pissed but calmed after a little bit. I did my best to comfort, but oddly, I'd wind up really pissed myself the next day at work.

It bothered me all day Monday in fact. My friends have enough to deal with without idiotic attacks from small-minded people...

Also, somewhere in this time interval, I read Holes (Louis Sachar). It was good but told a little simplistically. The plot and some of the twists were good and all, and there were some unexpected depths to some of the characters, but overall, it felt like a literary snack. A tasty one, to be sure, but not a full meal.

Moldy Maging

Got on close to 10 and found another Jungle party underway. But I'd gotten in with Ghost and Wenz on Ghost's LB1 farming and the party was full. Until about halfway into our time in the Nest's basement, that is ^^ Would love to have gone but couldn't bail on Ghost. (Deej took that spot) At 50 and 55 I think they'd have had a hard time pulling safely without aggro.

Bad moment of the night: Was on a long all-the-way-'round pull when I found an Exoray. Flashed it and headed back to camp. Noticed I seemed to be taking lots of hits and looked behind me. 3 molds! I arrived at camp, Benedictioned, and got to work. I finished one while they duoed another.

Just before the second fell, one of them used Dark Spore, major AoE. Ghost took 628 damage and was dead. I don't recall what his total HP is, but as a Taru, it was prolly close to that. He deleveled, but R3 got him back with a 6 XP buffer. We stuck around for a few more skillup kills do Wenz (I think) could get Penta Thrust.

Got another offer for the party but declined - it was just too late. Wound up meeting Kit in Jeuno who took the slot. Tele'd all of us to Altep, dropped off Ghost & Wenz so they could duo/SU, and then took Kit to Yhoator. Logged out where I logged in :3

Joked earlier on the way to Jeuno about the sudden inrush of new Rogues. Wondered whose pearlsack had a leak :3

Passing greets to Soho who left earlyish. Bouncing messages back and forth with Dark - Ninja Slobber attacks!

Summoning Friends

My late login was made later by the Synergy/Evolith update. Autumn was having a Jungle party but as I arrived, they planned to disband. Got maybe 10 minutes of actual XP.

Went back in time to work on "Tigress Strikes" Wings quest. All I need now is the Fort NPC CS, then the NM fight. Deej was asking about Tele-Vahzl so I opted to go see him. He was joined by Vavant, headed to the LB2 fights. I tagged along and the fights were cake. Vavant was very impressive on SMN, if a little proud.

They then planned to go get Leviathan and I had to leave >< He's the last avatar I need before going for the full whisper set! Prolly should have stayed on because I couldn't sleep with the news of a rash of car breakins.

Shortly before leaving, a number of presumably younger Rogues began chatting a little scatologically. I /sighed to both Deej (who was actively ignoring them) and Autumn (who asked them to knock it off). I didn't mean for Autumn to do that but with the sheer number of people on (and many were female) the subject matter was bound to offend or at least annoy.

Dark sent a bunch of POL messages. Isa had her baby (!) and he changed servers (!)

Wound up surfing the web: Found Autumn's homework novella (The Giver, Lois Lowry). Read some tech news and also visited the FF14 site. Saw that FF11 for PS2 is in fact getting very pricey. Can't remember who wanted it for PS3 play...

Earlier, went looking in the garage for classic toys and found many of the missing library books instead! Now I can finally clear my card after 13 years! Seriously!

Weekend Update Number Something

Saturday - This was a planned "catch up" session in Rogues. Autumn and other Rogues were prepping for Promy spire runs. We were at it from 3:30 to 7:30... 2 hours assembly, 2 hours on Dem. About 40 total AFK minutes including Kiora's dinner and my drop-off of kids. Easy win - I called animas! Still need my Holla, and Demire was very consoling about it :3

Got gear mostly sorted off Jesup ):

Gators were humiliated by the Crimson Tide. Sorry Tebow!

Keeping in a football mindset, we saw The Blind Side. Really good, if a little dramatic. Then Ape and I went to Taco Bell for a snack and all four of us ate Mexican fast food at 1:30am...

Sunday - Church, Shopping, Amazing Race. Meghan and Cheyne won. It seemed close but ultimately, the casino chip count to a million is what did the others in - only M&S got it right the first time.

Brutal Dunes party on SAM - couldn't get a full boat together but 4 of us soloed when the 5th left. Actually did respectably as SAM, SAM, THF, THF. only healing was from /DNC and rests and book buffs. Started having trouble and wiped. Ero got peeved and left and Archer came to rescue Dove and Tab. Soho came by to /poke me. Really need to get that guy a hobby ^^

At 11-ish I saw that the Adult Swim Christmas shows were coming up so I stayed up 'til 1am watching, laughing and AIMing. Deej was on and we had a great chat. My Little Ponies were discussed. Kush was on but mostly silent.

Oh, oh! Finally saw Mighty Boosh. Had seen previews, and even heard an NPR interview. But tonight was the first time I sat down and watched. Much much funnier than I'd expected - perfect Brit humour ^^

Wrap-Ups

My time back after Thanksgiving has been nuts. I've been working a lot of OT and Ape's been hogging the laptop. Also, the other laptop is dying...

(Addendum) Sunday 11/29 - Mimi was the only person to notice my nails - she gave me a nice compliment on the drive home.

Tuesday 12/01 - Took the day off.

Wednesday 12/02 - Had a long wait for Besieged, and got to duo with Bwynn. Afterwards, went Crimson Key drop farming with Kit. This mini-quest gets you a once-a-day shot at the Tenshodo Treasure Coffer. Got Erase, not Ususemi: Ni... Kepi was upset over lack of COR unlock help from the Rogues - mentioned to Deej I tried Monday but no time... Tried then to explain just how long it takes and how dangerous it can be. Need to direct her to my post about the run I went on prior.

Something about a stranger comforting Autumn over her BF changing servers?

Thursday 12/03 - Took off. Got my DDR PS3 adapter (my anniversary) for my CobaltFlux pad and tried it out - works great! I haven't been able to dance IRL for ages because my US PS2 is shot and my dance pad doesn't work on USB. Other PS2 to USB adapters failed me.

On Survivor, it was auction day (good stuff), Russell already found the idol John bought a clue to, lol. Private Practice was OK, interesting stuff with Addy's parents and Dell's wife blowing up the kitchen.

Friday 12/04 - It's date night! - We skipped the movie, opting to shop late-night Christmas sales and found only a few things. Much later, I got into another shell party (+Namkrow) in Qufim, on RDM. Went from 37-39, and just need 13k more for Convert and Refresh! Yay!

Random thoughts back from vacation. I've decided I have the following elemental affinities: Thunder, ice, water, and wind. Assuming half are pluses, the others are enfeeblers? In any case, I have always loved storms and snow. So, on the way up the mountain to go zip-lining, I stared into the approaching dark clouds and thought about stuff. It never did rain, or snow...

Hi Wenz! Hi Fahw! Hi Bloo!

(Fanservice Go!!!)

Um, hey!

There's your shout-out, Wenz!

Also, is Bloomonkey's name somehow related to Blooregard Q. Kazoo, of Foster's Home?

And thank Bloo for the PL help too!

Long Days

Sunday was a lot of fun. No, wait... It was a lot of angst, then about 12 hours of driving, with a couple of stops. We had the car packed and ready at 9:45, but Ape couldn't find the gifts she'd bought Saturday. So we tore the car apart, then the condo, then the individual luggage, then...about an hour later we repacked and left. Argh!

Worse yet, we had to skip breakfast, my fave meal. But it'd all work out when we found an IHOP that looked promisingly clean. They were having some holiday promotions, including Egg Nog pancakes. Imagine two pancakes, with vanilla cream between, laced somehow with egg nog flavor. Cap it with more cream, whipped cream, syrup, nutmeg and cinnamon. It sounds truly horrifyingly sweet.

Turns out, for the most part, it tastes a lot like a vanilla or banana Moon Pie. This is actually a good thing! :3

The ham, eggs and biscuits were fantastic as well, and the portion was so big I had leftovers for a late night snack.

The rest of the drive was uneventful, and the stretch on 321 from Charleston to Savannah was quaint and charming as always. We got in just after midnight, no traffic to speak of. After unpacking the car I set up shop and logged in briefly but I don't think I did anything significant.


Monday was another long day. I was supposed to have the day to myself, after bringing in the Christmas stuff, putting up the tree, a little cleaning, and finishing off Clone the Elder's science project board.

All of these things would take longer than planned, plus meals and the like. In any case, I was able to spend several hours in Vana'diel. I used that time to start dumping unnecessary gear to make room for the gear held by Jesup.

I also got to join Demire's all-day Qufim party, on PLD of all things. I got it all the way to 40! She kept that thing going from like 2pm to midnight, swapping out as needed. I think half the shell passed through that group!

Later I spent a little time with Soho, again in Qufim looking for some hand-to-hand weapon dropped in the treasure coffers. After Soho took off, I found Demire's group and PLed a bit and then Autum arrived, as the PL :3 So we dual-PLed some then I left.

I tried to get with Kepi to unlock COR but she came back from dinner too late. We talked over the plans and Kepi seemed a bit put off. I apologized profusely for not being able to do it then, but it'd have meant starting at close to 11, and she doesn't have her staging points yet...

I'd prefer to give that run a go with some shell 75s helping because of the True Sight danger. And maybe we could work it into a staging point, COR and PUP unlock run...

My AIM buddies may be wondering where I'd disappeared to but basically on the trip Ape hogged the laptop and we were running around or entertaining at our place.

Rushing Ninjutsu

(It took long enough!)

I lost track, and couldn't find anything to make notes on, but I had two brief parties on NIN. Enough to hit 37! The first was in the Citadel and I think Erolynne was in charge. The second was in East Ronfaure [S], and I believe Chelcie was coordinating on behalf of the mostly Japanese crew.

I died just as I made it to camp, but I sorta made up for it when Soho tracked me down and offered a level's worth of PL help. Poor fella's been having some headaches lately so he was tired. The help was appreciated all around!

Also appreciated was how Chelcie handled my leveling. She expected I'd be done at 37 and put the question to me. I concurred but said I'd stay as needed. Turns out after I hit 37 and said I'd stay 20 more for a rep, they wrapped anyway ^^

From My Heart...

(I think I lost the battle of the vows)

Today we renewed our vows, as did my Sis and her Hubby (aka The Springfield Connection). We were on 15, they 10. I had thought Mom & Dad were doing it too (at 41!) but they didn't. Our aunt (the one who lives in Sevierville, TN) handled the officiating and the location. She found this really beautiful and picturesque spot where, withing like 500 feet, you could use an old barn, covered bridge, rock-lined stream, or grassy hills. We opted for the bridge.

After an opening prayer and pronouncement, Ape and I went. She blew me away with what she'd written. Perfectly describing us and rhyming, too! She said she'd been sketching it out in her mind for days but only just put it to paper last night. Mine were written months ago for the planned Vana wedding. I incorporated pretty much all the major facets (friendship, partnership, divinity, love) but I didn't do it with her style.

And now, for your reading pleasure, my vows to Ape, and hers to me.

----------------------------

Destiny

(face guests)
Everyone has a destiny. That destiny may be a moment of greatness, or spectacular triumph. Sometimes it is marked by sacrifice or failure. And sometimes, Destiny is eight years old…

(face jesup) /em look into eyes

It is often found where paths meet, where an exchange of mind or heart takes place. Nearly thirty years ago, our paths would meet for the first time. We were preparing to proclaim our devotion to God, unaware that God had plans for us.

Years later, while in the company of others, our paths met again. This would set in motion the events that would lead us to share one path forever.

/em hug

There have been times when things did not always go as planned, but such is Life. Our commitment to each other has seen us overcome all challenges that have befallen us. Our friendship amplifies our triumphs and soothes our failure. Our devotion has taken many sacrifices from both of us, but our love has been greater still.

I humbly thank you for all you have given me throughout these years. I’m not the easiest person to live with but your simple kindness makes me feel incredibly cherished. You have supported me throughout all my adventures, and for that I am eternally grateful.

/em join hearts

“From my heart to yours” a gift: A bond unyielding, a love unending.

/em kiss

----------------------------

[Aerin],

Fifteen years ago, when I became your wife
I promised to love and honor you each and everyday of my life.
I’ve cherished all the memories we have made throughout these years
The ones that brought us laughter and even ones that brought us tears.
We’ve stuck by one another through the good times and the bad
I feel blessed to have you by my side and for all the fun we’ve had.
Through a house fire, infertility, and job losses we’ve stayed strong
That through this path of ups and downs I know where I belong.
For you love me for who I am and you understand me when I’m low
And you treat me like the most beautiful woman in the room no matter where we go.
You hold my hand when I have fears and snuggle me when I cry
You are my happy go lucky, kind-hearted soul, glass half full, sensitive guy.
In fifteen years we’ve accomplished many things together as a team
Two boys, a house, trips, two cars, and so much more in between.
I love how we still get excited about seeing each other each and every day
How we don’t feel complete or able to sleep when the other is away.
I’m so proud to be “Jesse’s girl”, your high school sweetheart and best friend
And I thank the Lord for giving me this love that will never end.
So my pledge for you from this day forward is to continue to stay true
And I will hold your hand and be there to support whatever you may do.
I know there will be more challenges and bumps along the road
But we will be together to support each other's heavy load.
Thank you for these fifteen years and for sweeping me off of my feet
And I will love you forever and a day because with you my life is complete.

[Aerin],

I thank the Lord everyday for giving me you and for letting me have another day to love you and be with you. He brought you into my life because he knew I needed someone who understands me and supports me when I need it, who loves me when I’m not so lovable, and who looks at me with admiring eyes when I don’t feel so pretty. He gave me a man who makes me feel special and who has such a positive attitude about life so I to can see the positive side of things. I love our life, our children, and the way we compliment each other so perfectly. You are my best friend and I think that is why our marriage is so strong. Thank you for choosing me to be the one. I am blessed.

Love,
April

----------------------------

P.S. Post Four Hundred?!

Turkey Day!

Our Vacation:

Tuesday:
Left work at 4-ish, Ape had house ready (please forgive my slackness Babe!), left at about 5:30.
Drive was super easy - not the first bit of unusual traffic, no slowdowns...
Hotel we got on our points was nice. Managed to get net access for a brief chat.

Wednesday:
Got up at 9, ate a great breakfast. According to Ape, our food was prepared by Morgan Freeman.
Drive continued effortlessly, but the rock-slide detour (planned in advance) added about an hour to the total.
Checked in to our condo and chilled some.
Ate at Gondoliers, our fave Italian. Met the whole crew. Great food and free dessert!
Shopping for dinner tomorrow.
Got online later and helped Fumiko and Tessu with Kazham key drops. Got two of three before falling out. Had a great chat with Soho, but he's Xbox only, no PC (meaning no AIM)...

Thursday:
Turkey Day! Started with a Zipline adventure (very fun!).
Came back, made food, ate.
Went to SILs condo so the kids could swim (indoor heated pool plus 2 water slides)
Returned to our place for Survivor (ah, nuts! Recap episode)

Tomorrow? Vow renewal by the river!

Get Over It, People!

Friday's news was all aflutter with what Glambert did. And with whom. I finally got to see the whole thing. *MY* thoughts:

* The "trip and roll" was very smoothly handled, to the point where it wasn't certain he didn't mean it on purpose.
* The overall act was definitely risque, but not necessarily more or less than others' performances.
* No, I wouldn't really want to be watching this with my kids, but Lambert's orientation isn't the issue - He was blatantly sexual, with a thong-snap, crotching of a dancer, model-dragging, and some dominatrixy-style stuff.
* The kiss wasn't anything special. I did think the pianist was rather goofy looking...

The Reaction
Aside from complaints flooding into ABC, Lambert's cancellation by GMA seemed extreme to me. Have these people ever seen a typical music awards show?

(fast forwarding to Thanksgiving Day)
Our condo has at least 15 people in it, all related to me in some way. Discussion turned to Amazing Race. My sister's co-worker is related to Sam & Dan, the brother-contestants who came out weeks before going on the Race. My aunt's reaction? "What a waste!"

Huh? If they find someone to love and they have good relationships with their lovers, what's wasted? Love is only wasted if it isn't shared!

The topic inevitably shifted to the AMAs and Adam's performance. More vitriol and intolerance, I'm afraid. I actually got up and left the room. I couldn't take it anymore.

Many of my closest friends over the last 15 years have been gay, and presently I can number at least 4 whom I'm close to. They're loving and normal and human, each of them, and I don't understand the resistance.

Dancing My Pants Off

(I really needed this!)

After Amazing Race, we realized our other two shows weren't coming on. The American Music Awards were on instead. I looked at Ape with a pleading expression (because I generally detest awards shows). She graciously sent me off. So I got a little Vana time after all.

Because AR was football-delayed, I didn't actually get logged in until about 9:30, and I did my usual shell and friendlist checks. Then I decided to flag up on Dancer, hoping to maybe get a short party that would get me 39 and on the way to 40. At about 9:45, Martimaki asked me if I wanted to join his group in East Ronfaure [S]. Heck yes!

It took me a little time to sort gear (sending the recollections to Surg and paying Demire for the animas), and I also OP warped to the wrong past-zone ><. But I got there. Just after 10, I ran up to the waiting party. I couldn't help but get flashbacks to the time I was here in March. But unlike then, we had no problems in the group and like that time, everybody was really nice.

I got asked to pull and so I did, trying my best. I had thought with only SCH for main-heal we'd be so-so on mana rests but there were two thing's I'd forgotten, not having leveled this high in ages: Zot, our SCH, had Sub, plus 2 charges. And I was expected to heal too (duh). Well, I had a little trouble with landing hits at first so Zot had to carry the load.

Until we dinged once or twice, then my ACC was plenty good and I essentially took over main-heal while Zot buffed, enfeebed and nuked. I started trying my best to chain-pull but I had to balance walking off to early to find the next link in the chain and fighting my TP up.

All that would change when the group hit 40. Zot immediately broke out one of the coolest Scholarly tricks, Accession. Then I remembered *I* had new tricks too! And oh my! Did I ever get a good one! Reverse Flourish pretty much gives me free TP, based on my usage of enfeebling steps. So now, as I joked with Deej (or was it in shell?) - I'm like a Samurai, but with /style/!

XP flowed fast and free, and there were no panics or deaths. I ended about halfway to 42, with much hope for finding parties again now that I have better abilities. I'll have to check with Demire but I'd expect at 45 I become everybody's best friend again with Haste Samba!

After Marti ended the party at just after 12, I got a whisper from Deej asking for Raise-help in Qufim. It took me a little time but I got out there, raised Kep, and stuck with the group (Hi again Sanwa!) PLing for about 20 minutes, then it was bedtime.

Random Dancing!

(Who knew bloodsuckers could be so tender?)

New Moon was awesome! I started the day in Team Jacob, but after what Edward went through for Bella, I had no choice but to switch!

I was marveling the other day... The Clones are 12 and 10, yet we STILL have, and use, some of their baby plates and bowls, as well as a few threadbare towels from their teeny-weeny youth. Blues Clues, Pat The Bunny, that stuff.

I swear there was some other random thought to go here... Ahh! Got it.

Maybe I'm the only one, but I adore the Old Navy Supermodelquins commercials.

Anyway, spent a really nice, but long day today with Ape for our anniversary. Had a fantastic brunch, then shopped for about 3 or 4 hours, then there was a concert and tree-lighting ceremony at the shopping center. Then New Moon!

Dreams in The Other World

(My real-world dreams are just fine, thank you :3 )

Today marks 15 fantastic years of wedded bliss with my Wifey! Ups, downs, ins, outs, we've had them all. And we've weathered them all. Together.

Seventeen and a half years ago I asked for her hand in marriage (after getting her father's blessing, of course). I asked her, "Will you share with me my life, standing with me as my Wife?"

In about a week, we'll be doing a "group vow renewal", with our 15th, my sis's 10th and my parents' 41st. And I'll read the vows I wrote for Vana'diel, with only a couple of minor changes. I may even keep the emotes ^^

After we do the renewal I'l post them here.

Later!

Putting the Why in My Whyyyne...

I tried to explain to the Rogues why I was so upset and down yesterday. Later, talking with Kushi, I hashed it out some more. Here, in a nearly verbatim nutshell (but with clarifying notes added) is why I'm gutted over this Wedding pricing nonsense.

I was unfairly harsh to my friends, but sometimes, I need to be propped up too ^^

[Wed Nov 18 2009 11:25:59 PM]

I know it sounds tremendously trivial but I needed a goal - something on the horizon to keep striving for.
I can realistically chat with you and the others here [on AIM], and for free.
I know Sky, Sea, Goliard, AF2, Dyna, all that will never happen now.
But dammit, I had everything for that stupid, beautiful dress and the engraved rings with our real initials on them.

[After offers of help]
I'm trying with Rogues [on missions, etc.], but my timing isn't so good. They're already working on CoP 2 and 3 and I'm stuck fighting Holla.
I'm tired of Vana'diel feeling like a job again. For a long run, I was having fun with my friends and doing new or cool things. Then my [previous] shells fizzled and FF14 was announced. Siren's a ghost town now. Realistically speaking.

[...a short time later...]
It's hard to explain... I did want those things.
I wanted to gear my WHM up right and prove my worth in the harshest conditions. I wanted to be the best main healer so that I could give people real enjoyment at a level of the game not all reach.
More than that though, I wanted to experience the storylines.
Not just YouTube them - I wanted to see them unfold by my hand.

I don't really care anymore about the gear and the glory. It was never really about that.
I know I've made real differences in some people's lives and that's enough.
And I don't intend to stop either.
But this wedding was the one thing blessed by Ape in this whole world. Did I ever tell you how that came to be?

Last year (last year!) about October or so, Ape and my mom are doing weekly line dancing classes.
My mom bails and Ape doesn't want to go alone, so I offer to go with her. Somewhere along the way she mentions Facebook weddings.
It's not anything other than a status as it turns out, so the deal becomes, I line dance with you, you let me get us married. It'll cost a little bit and take some time, but do we have a deal?
She agreed and in May I got Jesup. Ape never had any intention of real play, but she did enjoy running around towns and messing with people in chats.
The clones got a kick out of it for a month or so.
Then Jesup became a $13/month mule. Well beyond his expected lifespan.
I'm telling you this haphazard story to get back to the main point:
This was the one thing in Vana'diel April had any partnership in, however tenuous. The vows I wrote and would have recited were very real.
Tomorrow is our 15th anniversary, and in a week or so, we'll be renewing our vows.
I plan to read the unused Vana vows. Almost verbatim. They're really good.
Yes, I really just wanted the dress so I could look prettyful. Yes, the rings with our real initials would have been nice too.
But I've spent nearly three years in service to the denizens of Vana'diel, doing my best to keep myself useful.

THIS was my one indulgence - by me, for me.

That's why, for the first time in like, ever, I've shown any kind of negative emotion around others ingame. Never had much need before...

No More Dreams in Vana'Diel

I may be through with Final Fantasy.

After getting a second full account in May (paying from June on)...
After earning the gil for a large wedding plus the dress (130k)...
After trying *three* chaperones and not having any luck with them...
And AFTER the new do-it-yourself system debuting the day before Ape and I celebrate our real-life 15'th anniversary...

Square-Enix decides to screw me. The dress and ring can now be bought straightaway. The problem?

The dress costs 8x what it did, and the ring (which would have been included in a ceremony as cheap as 30k) is 80k. For ONE. For Jesup and Aer to wed, I need 560,000 gil. 4x what it would have cost before.

And what's more - 130k before got a fully run ceremony - arrive and drive, as it were. Now, I *think* 560k just dresses the bride and provides 2 rings (needed for certificate) but the Player Event Service (for the actual ceremony) costs as well.

I hailed a GM, and was surprised to get a response. I made my case and got a polite "make a complaint" speech, and when I asked why the price would jump so high, I was told maybe 560k was the average of the previous ceremonies. Wha~?!

I am honestly and truly gutted over this. I already gave up on dreams of endgame, of AF2, of Goliard gear and sea and sky access. This wedding was all I was holding onto and now they deny me even this.

I have made real mistakes sure, but should I still be paying for them? In this way?

I'm so ready to just walk away...

Somebody give me a reason not to. Please?

Healing Touches

Healer Kepi, I kneel to you. Than you so much for that chat while I was remoted into work - it was great fun comparing notes and impressions on the first book in the Last Herald Mage trilogy. It was also fun catching up on Milk history and the cool meaning of your name.

I hope you got as much out of it as I did ^^

Thanks!

Deej, you make me laugh. Glad I can be there for you :3

Tuesday I slept the sleep of Ambien, falling out at 9:45 but of course, waking up 5-odd hours later. I still don't know why longer sleeps elude me /still/.

Wednesday was some good (and gross) Rogues LS chat. I got some bad news (see next post) so after some self-pity, I opted to help Demire and Onie get two of his Bardic AF pieces. First was in the Nest and the second was in Castle O. No real drama and actually had pretty good luck with both. Logged out at 10:15.

Sunday Funday

(Busy but happy)

More housework - garage cleaning and some other cleanup.
Worked with Elder on some of his HW and Sci Proj, then took him for his choice lunch. Followed by GameStop and a Coke run (finally, on sale again!)
Spent a little time in Vana with Kepi and later Soho camping VE. Kep actually got claim but no drop. Soho gave her the pin she'd no longer needed ^^
Also had a long chat with Kep about the first book of Last Herald Mage and related stuff.
Matt and dad lost out and were eliminated on AR
Left at 9:15 to watch the rest of the shows.
Read at bedtime after finding batteries for my HP booklight

---

Got to work early and read 15 minutes, then an hour more at lunch. 'Lyndel's dead already?!
Waiting for car to warm up, I read 5 more minutes - actually shook when Van slit his wrists - I /felt/ it and since I drove off shortly afterward I felt weird and foggy for a bit after.

Did I Mention I'm Back?

(New books! New books!)

Today was a busy day. We're getting closer to two major deadlines - Clone the Elder's Science Fair project, and our annual family reunion in Tennessee. So more of my time is going to be spent with chores and helping with school. Like today f'rinstance:

We (by we I mean mostly Ape) cleaned, did laundry and dishes and other prep for Christmas decorating. I know I've said Halloween is my favorite holiday, and I stand by that. But only in the context of the singular day. There's something magical about the Christmas *season*, the decorating, spirit, weather, etc. that is heartwarming to me. And I forgot to mention that last week I saw my first Christmas display and it was very nice! ^^

While I did help Ape some with the chores I also got on AIM a bit. Got to chat briefly with Autumn and Kushi.

From home, we headed to one of my favorite places on this planet. Chamblin Bookmine is a used bookstore. But it's not like many regular stores. If you can imagine a largish building, with at least one annex jutting out of it, filled floor to ceiling with books, you almost have it. The aisles are nearly as narrow as the shelves are wide and there's plenty of odd angles and curves. It is a claustrophobic place, and what must be a firetrap to boot. And I'd live there if I could. They have books from around the world and of all vintages. All genres. Nothing is beneath or beyond them (so far at least).

I bet I could find 95% of the books on my list there, if only I knew where to look :3 All kidding aside, I went straight for the Sci-Fi/Fantasy section to find three things. Silver Metal Lover (Tanith Lee), Magic's Pawn (Mercedes Lackey) and Burning Alive (Shannon Butcher). I found the first two but not the third. I wasn't surprised as BA is pretty new and by and large the new books seem to be from major launches, not a romance series. Yes, BA is shelved in Romance, as I found out when I asked the guy at Books-A-Million Friday night...

The other great thing about Chamblin is they will take much of your old book inventory for generous credit. And since most of what they stock is half-off cover price, it's not too hard to leave with a respectable number of titles in exchange for the stuff you've already read.

April hates being in there and gets sick quickly. See, she *is* claustrophobic, poor thing.

From there, it was off to Ape's school to complete the observations needed for the project. We finished the actual experimental part of Elder's project. Now all we have to do this week is to organize the logs and data and prep the board and report.

The experimenting took longer than Ape expected so we were hustling to get wrapped up and off to evening Mass. This time, instead of the contemporary service on Sunday that irks me so, we went to the church we both attended for years as children, and the same one (same priest even!) wherein we were married 15 years ago! After Mass we bought two T-shirts. They're actually quite nice, with the name on the front and a nice picture of their rose window ringed with Psalms 96.

The rest of the evening was dinner at one of Ape's favorite BBQ restaurants (oops, originally typed resTARUants lol), a little shopping at K-Mart (I like to think of it as last chance shopping it's so dreary and draining - everybody looks half-dead in there), and finally home.

Just saw a great Law & Order while blogging - a little terror-mongering?. Also, given my feelings on the subject, I wonder why SVU is my favorite L&O? Maybe it has to do with Det. Benson? -runs away-

I finally made it into Vana'diel only to find Kushi and Kepi online in shell! If Deej had been on too it'd have been a right reunion! ^^ There was some chatter, but about half the shell was doing advanced CoP. Hiketun and K were working together as K PLed Hike on SCH. I took up Trail's offer to go to Kuftal Tunnel to skill up. At my levels, all I had available to me was Staff, but what the heck.

We had no trouble with he on DRK and me on WHM/SCH. Later, he asked if we could raise a friend in the Desert. I agreed of course, and some time later we found the corpse. Stoik's corpse! So I raised him after a little griefing, then he joined us as the SU became a Blue Mage spell party. After an hour and a half of effort though, Stoik still didn't have Death Scissors...

TM had left us around midnight to go eat with a friend, and when I left Stoik at close to 1:30 TM hadn't returned.

There was some chatter in shell about WHM and SCH aversions with someone asking who'd want to max WHM. I jumped up of course, saying for me it's all about the party support. Kushi shot back with a grin, "We all know /your/ excuse, Aer." Har-har ^^

In any case, I got to see Stoik again and help out TM, who I kinda had to leave hanging that night with Red. And I got 4 full levels on Staff, and an odd fraction or two on Heal and Enhance.

~-~-~-~

I started the Last Herald Mage trilogy with Magic's Pawn tonight. I got two chapters in and already I can tell this is going to be a powerful, emotional read. This one was up-voted many times on that recommended reading list, and Kepi has a lot of feelings for this series as well.

It only took a few pages, but it's clear I'm going to be affected by this one because I already see a lot of my youthful self in Van. A *lot*.

When I'm reading second-hand books, especially from a place like Chamblin's, I really wonder about the last owner/reader...

And finally, my heart aches for one of my friends - we talked about some stuff and I really wish there was something I could do for him...

Catastrophe!

As per our custom, Friday was Movie Night. All four of us went to see "2012". Three of us had eagerly anticipating it. Clone the Younger was not happy about it, but basically, we dragged him. We had plans to see an 8pm show but despite having tickets, there were not enough seats close enough together. We traded the tickets for a 9:30 and went to the nearby bookstore. I managed to find Soho's booklist recommendation, "Burning Alive" and it does look pretty good.

So, the movie... You'd have to actively be avoiding opinions on the latest CGI-gasm from Roland Emmerich. Pretty universally panned. We knew that going in but were hopeful it would work as a "mindless popcorn flick". By and large it did. I felt that the initial "escape" sequence was the best, as the action and terror (and scores of unfortunate victims) was much more palpably felt/experienced than the "plane-level" stuff.

In any case the premise is mostly crap, and the "unlikely hero overcomes a billion challenges to beat the odds" thing wears thin about halfway in. Yes, the visuals are pretty good. Yes, the apocalypse stuff is suitably scary. Yes, it was mostly enjoyable. But come ON... If the world was ending and this guy was really racing through L.A. in a limo, he'd wind up with a flat or stuck in debris 20 minutes in. Dead. All dead.

Or, said another way, if the world DOES end, and I have to track down my family and get them to safety, I'm going to be /really/ upset if I break my leg on a fallen tree limb and die in a ditch instead of saving humanity.

Also, I'm itching for Kep to get on (and having seen it as well) so we can bash the science. Neutrino storm, mutated particles, microwaved planetary core?

Oh, one last movie review note - there was a surprising amount of harsh language. Gratuitous and irrelevant to the plot/action. Oh well...

My FFXI grounding ended today as well, so I logged on. I saw the Rogues' /lsmes and thought it referred to another promy spire run. So I decided to farm recollections rather than rely on the amazing generosity of the Rogues. While there, Ben came on, also needing Holla. Sometime around now, I realized the planned missions were not for spires, but for the missions beyond. So we gamely tried to put together a run.

Soho and Kit were in, and we kinda planned out loud as it were. But it soon became evident the run wasn't going to happen before everyone else started 2-3 Saturday morning. Ben eventually found himself a party and we put off the run for "as soon as possible". Meanwhile, for over an hour, Soho met me and we duoed for recollections and fun.

Soho apparently has maxed all jobs, and some more than once. She was on SMN and likely wearing their AF2 gear. We chatted amiably and then the fact she's a professor came back up. I'd read that from her LS welcome post but forgot. She mentioned also being something of a poet and she put up a work on Rogues. It's a sciency take on "The Night Before Christmas". Pretty good!

Once I'd maxed my inventory we parted ways. I jumped on AIM and got to chat with Kepi, who was rereading "The Last Herald Mage" trilogy again and quite affected by it. We chatted about generalities and favorite books and movies. It seems I need to find "The Last Samurai", and besides, I was wanting to see that when it came out theatrically.

Then after that, Deej came on. Apparently I've upset Kep and she didn't tell me. So now I have to figure that out as soon as I can. We had a great chat overall though, and then I went to bed.

Russell The Leprechaun

(I want his luck to run out!)

Watched the Thursday shows with Ape & (for at least the first two) Clone the Younger. Survivor turned out good: Russell found the second idol without clues but lost the chance to eliminate Laura when she won immunity. At Tribal, all but 4 of 10 votes were on Russell. He's gonna have to scheme harder now, but there's supposedly another idol out there. Yikes!

Chatted with Autumn for awhile during Survivor, she talked poetry and I liked her new one. Also read her Harry Potter "songfic" on FanFiction.net. Pretty good stuff! As the other commenters said, I'd love to see the aftermath. Sorrows post is 9/25.

Kushi came on after nearly a week away asking if I was upset. Huh? She's the one who said she was done. Reminded her but offered friendship, with the caveat that I wasn't sure how that'd work.

Normally I don't go for happy, tidy endings. But on Private Practice I was actually kinda happy the two crash vics made it, plus the breeched baby was delivered OK. Them Mom died when the rescue team popped the door. Argh.

Last night, went outside the restaurant while it was cool, drizzly and breezy. I love fall weather and don't always get to enjoy it. I made a point of doing so last night lest things get busy and I forget.

ALIVE

(I don't have a "deep respect and compassion" icon)

I bought a "To Write Love On Her Arms" shirt today. I've wanted one for awhile now but the selection at Hot Topic failed to thrill. But after a chat I had with a good friend the other night I made it a point to grab one. I picked up the light grey one that has TWLOHA written out over the right breast.

I'm not sure how much I've blogged in here about it, but I know I've shared with some of you. I have plenty of personal experience with depression/suicide and addiction, both my own (depression) and in helping others (both). I've lost family to suicide and I've helped others when they were on the edge.

My "Well of Sorrows" post is revealing here, because I accepted that gift during a particularly dark time in my life. So when my friend shared what they shared about their experience, I decided to stand up publicly.

Here's the best part... While the shirt is a little small for an XL, it's an appropriate length. It looks good. But my family insists it's a girl's shirt... /sigh

-~-~-

I just realized something - the first letters of my three shells spell "RMT". Time to shuffle the order?

To whomever was driving what looked like an Infiniti, maybe 7 years old, I'm sorry. I made things harder on you than needed during our little drag race. Please forgive me.

This...

SUCKS...

Maybe I can make it back by 11/18, for the wedding stuff...

P.S. On the way to Clone the Elder's school, i saw a Toyota Prius with Virginia plates. The plate read "HAL 9K". I tried to get the driver's attention but the honking didn't work. Wonder if the older couple in the car are bigtime Arthur C. Clarke fans, like the idea of HAL, or got the plate by accident...

Also, someone in my building has "K PLAH" [sic]. One day I'll track them down and ask just how "success"ful their motto's been for them ^^

From Bad...

(I hate that things can always be worse...)

Hello everyone!

It is with a heavy heart and bowed head that I must leave Vana'diel for awhile. This is not the break I mentioned a week or so ago. This is the result of mistakes I've made intersecting with family drama.

I have been sad all weekend because of some stuff that went down both here and at home. Last night at about 9pm it boiled over. Basically, I'm tired of hurting and disappointing people.

So, I've made what peace I can with the three people I *know* I've wronged. If there are any others please know I'm sorry. If you have a hankering to talk to me (or yell at me) there's a number of ways to reach me outside of in-game chat: POL message (I check those via web at FL+), AIM (aerinofsiren), and Yahoo mail (aerinofsiren at yada yada). I'm trying to figure out how to enable the cellphone texty thing from AIM so I can get updates live.

I will be back. I love you all too much and would miss you too much to stay away for good. Plus there's the wedding and Jesup's exit to do...

Fare the well, Friends. I will see you as soon as I can.

~Aerin

Ex-Spired

(Old habits and all...)

Friday night - nothing was going on. Was I too late? I offered my services but nobody needed me :( Got on a chat with all the Milk members, and wound up chatting with Kep about reading for like 2 hours. Also had a long chat with Kushi, and she decided to go for good.

Saturday - Logged on at 2:15 to prep for the 3pm Promy marathon. Farmed for a bit then finally assembled for Mea. Kit stayed out while the rest of us (see pics) did battle against the Delver. I was on WHM duty. I warned the group I hadn't done 30 on White Mage in forever, but Mea was cake. And actually quite exciting.

There was a looong wait while we changed the lineup, got meds and figured out stuff. There was some AFK time from some. Somewhere along the line we changed the planned spire to Holla, meaning if we won, I'd be done and finally able to get to Tavnazia.

Remember my warning to the group earlier? Yeah, I blew it bigtime. The climb was uneventful and the fight started well enough, but then I pulled hate. And died. With a nice unused reraise scroll still in my pocket. The wipe didn't take much longer. Craaap. Craaaaaap.

I feel horrible about it, seeing as how 5 other people waited with me for like 90 minutes to kick off the run, plus the hour of the run itself and my gaffe probably wasted it. Never mind the lost animas and meds.

I apologized profusely and then had to go help Clone the Elder with his science project research. Everybody was very good-natured about it but I can't escape my WHM guilt ^^

Wed/Thurs

Tues - Can't remember anything specific. Working very late lately so less time.

Wed - Autumn took me and Hiketun on MMM runs - interesting and fast. Short night. Teased Autumn for not checking the board.

Thurs - Only had time to say Hi because Ape didn't stay in the LR and Maat had homework I had to help with. During Grays I actually cried when the little boy died, his parents saw him and then mom, the doc (Callie's sad GF) and dad said the "sleep spell" Bad dreams bad dreams go away good dreams good dreams here to stay.

Oh, got a lol from Autumn when I turned a typo about Utsusemi: ni and ninjas into a Python-ed "Knights who say ni" bit. Apparently she and some others love the movie.

Plans underway for avatars tomorrow night - will join if I can after date night.

Dance Fever

(It's about time!)

Monday night was rushed. I'm still working overtime and Ape-time and housework don't go away just 'cos I'm overworked ^^ When I got on I made my greetings to the Rogues, some of whom were going for the Royal Jelly BCNM. Dragonsamurai, a.k.a. Kitary was leading the runs and Deej was in one group.

I don't have a suitable 40 yet, so I deferred with thanks for the offer. About this time, Fhox pops on asking what I'm doing. He's back in Batallia soloing tigers for XP and SUs. I decided to join him on DNC37 as he was BLM38. I know the last time the four Brigaders tried it we were lower, maybe 34. But when I arrived I found soloing the tigers was very easy, if a little slow.

So Fhox and I worked our way around, doing a couple pages and having an easy time of it. This was excellent practice for me, and I got to fix my DNC macros too. Because I totally forgot I now had Drain II and Healing Waltz, the Dancer equivalent of Erase. Even so, I proved to be a much better DNC than NIN, and joked with Fhox about it, who roffled :3

After his second page, I logged out to get some rest. I got to chat a bit with Deej, Kushi and some of the Rogues but it was a short night overall.

Now, fast-forward to Tuesday dance class. "Wave on Wave" / "Push It" has fallen! I can now dance that infernal dance! It's actually a very good, fast dance with some graceful sections and some hip-hoppy sections. I had to stop the teacher finally because I just wasn't getting two of the transitions.

Ape had fun because she brought a friend who had a good time and they chatted after class for about half an hour. Of course, a pumpkin-flavored custard helped too ^^

Tricks and Treats!

(General mood of the weekend - some ups-n-downs, of course)

Friday was pretty quiet. We went to eat then rented "Nim's Island". When this was in theatres I was pleased we passed on it. It looked too typical of "kid friendly family fare" often cranked out these days. Turned out to be pretty decent. Rent-worthy for sure.

Spent a little time in Vana'diel and noticed Deej was once again in Promy. I joked about it and he said it was his new shell's doing. He suggested I talk to Surgical but I wasn't ready. Despite not having stopped in TV in several days...

Saturday was super busy, but a lot of fun. For starters, we had two birthdays to attend. One was for the son of our good friends from the east-side. The little one just turned one and mom threw a big Halloween-themed bash. Mom also cooks and is super crafty. You should see the handmade cards she makes! And the hors d'oevures (if I got that right on the first try...) were very creative, and tasty!

From there it was off to my nephew's birthday slash Florida/Georgia party. That went very well too. I was doing my best to eat and snack lightly at both of these in anticipation of all the candy we were about to get. As sundown approached, we got the kids ready. I broke off and sat outside on the porch, soaking in the ambiance. The moon was high and full and super bright. There were orange lights around the porch, and a large inflatable and some smaller decorations around. The weather was agreeable and I got to enjoy about three minutes of atmosphere and happy before the rest of the gang poured out the door.

Thus shaken from my moment, we all went Halloweening. We saw some good costumes and house setups, but sadly there were a lot of non-participants too. And there were many more "average" costumes than cool ones. Man I really wish I had my cosplay gear already! As soon as I get Altana Viewer running somewhere I'm going to ask our good friend's mom about a commission. Her clothcraft is supposedly really up there - like 80+?

It was during a quiet part of the walk Ape told me something that made my heart ache - she had thought she was pregnant but the tests she just did said otherwise. We aren't specifically trying for more but we both love kids and certainly wouldn't turn one down! She was a little sad over it, saying she wanted to surprise me. I feel for her because it took us months and medical intervention for Clone the Elder to pop. So to speak.

Anyway, by the time we wrapped up the door-to-door and stopped at a relative's house (great creepy snacks!) it was very late getting home. I think I came on close to 11 and there was Deej, off again (!) on a promy. This time, he basically arranged it so I'd meet the leader. And so, I joined The Rogues of Siren.

Funny thing - I've partied with most of these people, and funnier still, Lucylulu (search for the post please) was here. As were her parents, Demire and Naax. Now that is awesome! I've met many couples, dating and married. But I think the three of them are the first time I've met two generations. Goldenkid, Surgical, Tracent (of the recent lame party) and others were here, and familiar to me.

I was invited along on a promy marathon, although I didn't realize we'd be at it for four+ hours. I was supplied with animas and some other goodies and I felt bad when I wasn't allowed to pay. But I tried my best to make it up by doing the best I could, on DNC/NIN. Mea and Dem were cake, actually. Only Holla, evil Holla would prove too much.

Sometime during a private chat with Deej on the shell roster, he gave me a splendid compliment. He said he really liked Naax and Demire as parental types, but that I was his favorite "adult". Not sure why the quotes but I blushed. And said I hoped I never disappointed him in that regard. Later still, he offered some unused antidotes to me prior to logging out. I offered to pay but all he asked for was a hug. Awww~!

Sun - Housework... Lots of housework... Then we had to go shopping for science project stuff and other assorted junk. At Town Center, I broke off a line with the Staples cashier I'll prolly never get to use should I live to 100: On hearing that she's studying nuclear physics (came up because we were talking about science projects) a "brilliant" line popped into my head and I took the shot:

"Sooo... Hoping to find the Higgs boson?" She responded enthusiastically affirmatively and I added that it's be neat if she could go to CERN. Apparently one of her sponsors is involved in the project. Thank you Alpine Kat!

Logged in just in time to join Surgical, Autumn, Oldgrey and Tracent in Besieged, then escorted Redgaer from Holla to Xarcabard. Unable to help Bee and Trailmix (from Rogues and also a longtime friend of Bee's!) in Citadel with gate breach. They got it tho'! This all happened during the Sunday Shows:

Amazing Race was quick, but two teams (Team Zebra and Poker Pals) got hopelessly stuck and it was tough waiting to see who would finally make it. Team Zebra prevailed, with the poker chicks having to be stopped by Phil because everybody else was done and I'm sure the crew was ready to go eat.

Desperate Housewives was really good - asked in shell if anyone else watched, no admissions. It's getting appropriately soapy. And hey - cat fight!

Brothers and Sisters was not bad. Sweet surrogacy thread with Scotty and Kevin. Kitty's cancer thing is getting sadder (my mom had cancer) and the Tommy's back angle was not to my liking. But I did like how Nora and Tommy came to an understanding at the end.

Simple Pleasures

Tuesday:

Basic XPing with Fhox, Bene and Aeru (nee Zero nee Lust). He never did answer where he got his name from... Anyway, the RDB crew was in Batallia and I joined them on NIN. We did well, Aeru getting BLU magic and the rest of us getting XP. Things went bad fast when we switched to FoV before Aeru's upcoming bedtime.

Two-thirds through the page, I went to pull. I linked, and linked again. We got wiped. So, HPs and no FoV bonus. I'm sorry everyone!

Wednesday:

Arrived just in time for Besieged and did pretty well for myself. At first, it looked like we were gonna get mauled by the Undead, as only 260 people were in Al Zahbi. But we pulled it out, and I think the Nemean Lion *may* have bit the dust. Lifespan-wise, I was doing well, surviving a number of close calls (I'm still fond of AoEs), and in one case, I got taken down to 34 HP but survived.

Once the Lion appeared, I started dying A LOT, but I was able to keep RR up, and did my best to raise others. I finished with assorted fractional SUs and 1,800 LP. Saw Raki out there - I need to ask him if the Lion bit the dust.

Thursday:

I guess I'm updating... That bar just doesn't move very fast on ClearWire speed.

In otherworldly news, would the idiots of the world please unite? Form your nation of idiocy somewhere far from me, and leave me the hell alone. If I can make it to old age without being killed on the roadways, I'll be very pleased. I had not one, but two people cut me off in one intersection requiring me to slam on brakes and swerve. I also screwed up - I was in 1st gear and when trying to avoid the first car, I over-revved and spun the rotors to 9,600 RPM. That's not a typo. Ninety-six hundred. There's supposed to be a fuel cut at 9,400 but I don't think it did its job.

Random thoughts for today:

Least favorite voluntary activity: Shopping for a car.

Second least? Using the facilities in a communal bathroom. Like the one we have at work. For the love of pete, some of these people are even on the phone whilst they're on the john. I'm not special or immune from bodily functions. But I sure don't want to be surrounded by other people. And their /smells/.

Abandonment

(This is my current mood and NOT a reflection on any person)

I logged in Friday night, Saturday afternoon, Saturday night, Sunday night and Monday night. I had some very nice chats with my friends. But lately I'm feeling very frustrated...

I had plans for myself in Vana'diel. Plans on being an amazing White Mage. I know I took my sweet time reaching Maat and then beating him. But I really wasn't prepared for the total lack of progress since.

Aside from a couple of lucky-break PUGs for Aht Urghan missions, I have made zero progress on Nation, ZM, CoP or Altana missions. I've been 6-2 for ages and on the prelim missions in Zilart and CoP. I bought both Crystalline Prophecy and Moogle Kupo-d'Etat and have only managed the first missions of each.

Nyzul and relics and advanced weaponskills? Not happening either. AF2? Nope.

Lately, none of the shells I'm in wants to do these things, likely because they did them all long ago. Or because I'm often the only Windurstian...

AU and Jeuno are practically silent these days and if the party I got tonight is all I can get then, I guess I'm done XPing. Last Saturday's morning run was fantastic but the next two parties were letdowns. Tonight, f'rinstance, I was in the group for 2 hours. I got 4k XP. I can get close to that soloing FoV, but I hate doing that.

As many of my old friends are returning, it seems others are pulling back or leaving altogether. Swift return, Dark!

Life in Vana'diel was often *work* for me. But it used to be fulfilling work. I'd kick tail on main-heal, or break out my lowbies and share my time and insights with the Dunes Newbs. But with 14 on the horizon, it seems like people are bailing already. I haven't seen 2k players on a weeknight in some time and more than once over the weekend the total was under 2k as well. Hard to get an invite when there are only 16 seekers on...

Nowadays, I log in, flag up and feel like I'm chained to the chat log. Hoping I'll get the 'vite that never comes. Sometimes I do get to chat with my friends, whom I cherish deeply. But many nights, either no one's on or nobody's talking.

If it weren't for my dear friends and my desire for that wedding dress and rings, I think I'd already be gone. Or at least on hiatus.

Some have told me to use my LFG time on one of the world's hobbies. Well, I would, but I can't see the point raising Fishing or Woodworking up to usable levels just in time for the server wipes. And with more people out, the economy's gonna get fudged up too I'm afraid. Thankfully my main doesn't cost anything except for whatever Echo Drops go for. And that's only for when I'm careless or unlucky. So~o glad my main isn't NIN or RNG!

Any of you still reading my diary here, please know this isn't directed at any one of you. I don't want to even think of leaving the world that has been part of me for almost 3 years now. Aerin is basically me, and in a lot of ways, I'm her too. Past posts have highlighted how my focus on healing has made me feel like a better person in real life. And how it's just my nature to nurture.

I don't *want* to leave. But I'm getting tired of wasting hours every night not getting anywhere. If all I wanted was to chat with my friends, I'd toss FFXI, pocket the money, and just run AIM Express.

Oh wait, I did run AIM Express. "aerinofsiren", surprise surprise. I make no promises how often I'll be on, but I do truly value the friendships I've made these past 3 years and want to leave some line open if anyone wants.

P.S. I'm NOT leaving yet! Just mulling it over. For now, I'll still be on following my normal schedule.